So let's talk about Candidia, kids. The set of Saved in Vancouver to be exact.
The hair girl was great. She gave me big floozy Virginia Madsen-type hair. Her and her fellow Canadians have the cutest speech patterns. "Heavens to Betsy and Pete." They also say "righto" or "eh" after everything. The hair girl and the AD were having a conversation about hepatitis (I started it) and they said something blah blah needle blah cock blah hepatitis, eh? and then I asked what kind of hep and they said "Eh." And I said no...there's 3 kinds. One from eating shit, one from sex and another one. They looked at me like i was a lunatic and said a rather long drawn out syllable of "Aaaaaeeeh." I then realized they were saying hepatitis A and not "hepatitis, eh?"
My experience with the makeup gal girl wasn't so sweet. Her name was Lily but she reminded me more a weed. She had pin straight blond hair w/ ends flipped out, false lashes and a hip huggers that looked authentic 60's. I'm christening her Mary Tyler Whoore.
She wasn't allowed to do my face because I know how I look best. But she had to sit next to me to supervise and make sure I wouldn't throw some glitter on. She was so passive aggressive ("you're not moisturizing first?" & "hmmm...purple?). I finally pointedly put down down my brush and told her I know the difference between Tranny la Toillette and Pretty So-real-you-can-smell-the-fish Tranny. That shut her up.
She did get to lay a hand on me though when she was attempting to put a fake head wound on my forehead. Now I've had headwounds from the best during Nip/Tuck
. Eryn Krueger and the Burman's makeup team has collectively won over 30 Emmy's. So when she broke out her little scar kit, I felt obliged to say something.
"that's doesn't look real."
"yes it is does".
"a knife wound wouldn't have a bunch of little tributaries of cut flesh."
"all of a sudden you're an expert?"
"Uh Yea... I was on Nip/Tuck
. I know."
"Well let's just trade places then and you do my job for a day."
"only if you let me wear that super cute hat."
She stopped trying to put the scar on after that.
She did say one more thing though. Bitch said I needed to "blend my rouge." Ha....and they say there's no language barrier.
She didn't know she was messing with the US of Haaey.